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Tuesday, February 8, 2011

The SuperBowl Halftime Show: Preferable to Rape?

Pictured Above: The Black Eyed Peas
Not Pictured: Talent


 


Well boys and girls, I, like many of you tuned in to watch the Super Bowl. And like any similar minded people I dreaded the half time show. If only The Who could play again. But no, instead we got the Black Eyed Peas. And with that, allow me to review this "performance".

The show had quite an interesting concept going for it. It was like a walk down memory lane for Black Eyed Peas fans starting from their most recent contributions to what passes for music and ended with some of their first songs. The costumes (of the dancers at any rate) were colorful and invited into a visually arresting light show even if they were direct rip offs of many already existing ideas (see daft bodies). Of course, none of this had to do with the Peas, the only weak point in an otherwise outstanding show.

It seems that the Black Eyed Peas have aged, and none to gracefully. The music, firstly, was just stupid. It was straight forward, unimaginative, and in general devoid of any soul. The premises for the songs were contrived and as evident of the Peas unwillingness to make anything that can be listened to outside of a club (possible exception: Where is the Love). But of course, this is about the show.

The performance started out splendidly. Fergie's mic was clearly off and I applauded whatever intrepid young sound technician had the gumption to step in and say: "Dammit! That woman has no place singing!" Unfortunately he was shut down and they turned her mic back on. She was by far the worst of the group, singing all over the place in terms of pitch and making me long for the sweet tones of fingernails on a chalkboard. The others seemed wholly unenthusiastic and seemed to resent their apparent success at getting to perform at the Super Bowl. The songs were terribly cut together, the transitions were jarring and in questionable order. It begs the question; is the premise so important that the playlist should sound terrible? Short answer: No.

They also did a cover of Sweet Child O' Mine by Guns N Roses with Slash. Who gave Slash permission to ruin his previous band's songs? Also why in the hell was he necessary for this performance? All he does is play the main riff while the Peas remix the rest of the song and honestly that is what, 10 notes? Look, Axl Rose is a jackass who has ruined his share of classic songs. He's nothing but a clown that fronted what was a very good band. Musically, he is a piece of shit. I tell you this because I want you to be fully aware of my contempt for Axl Rose when I say, his version of this song is so much better that I'd rather listen to that every day for the rest of my life if I could erase the Peas' performance of it from my mind. For starters, they had Fergie sing it. Off key off pitch Fergie (dibs on that name). Her rasping rendition makes the idea of walking through Central Park at 2 AM in a tube top and hooker heels seem like an enjoyable and fulfilling experience.

It was bad is what I'm saying.

That being said there were some high points. They did a full field running man while wearing light up clothing. And it had the courtesy to end after 8 minutes of auditory rape.

27 comments:

  1. what made it worse is that the Steelers lost

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  2. I had the game on mute most of the time, I decided to un-mute it when i saw the half time show start...it was promptly muted again lol

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  3. I totally agree. The performance was garbage, and it doesn't help that I already don't like the Black Eyed Peas.

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  4. Felt very strange, like slash is just some cheap gag to make the BEP retro or some shit. Sorry, but some over-the-hill disney washout singing classic songs over slash's amazing guitar is not entertaining.

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  5. Bill oreilly said it best: "sun goes up, sun goes down. tide goes in, tide goes out. black eyed peas suck live. i cant explain it."

    http://randomramblingggg.blogspot.com/

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  6. Black Eyes Peas have alway sucked haha

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  7. Personally I think that group should just break up already. Didn't get to see the superbowl myself, wasn't tele where I live!

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  8. I wish it could have been a band that hasn't dried up and shriveled amongst its previous success only to find itself utter trash.

    Sorry BEP fans, but that was HORRIBLE.

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  9. I ate pizza and jacked off instead of watching this

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  10. I was honestly a big fan of the light up people. But, Fergie scared me a lot with her man voice.

    following and supporting

    http://812photography.blogspot.com/
    http://ducks2nucks.blogspot.com/

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  11. Lmfaoo at the no talent in the pic part xD

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  12. I hate the black eyed peas :/ But honestly the light people were cool haha, even if the music was terrible at least that was awesome! XD

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  13. I completely by-passed the Super Bowl this year,

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  14. It was just horrible what they did and they should be ashamed of themselves, glad i had the thing muted through 95% of it

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  15. yeah i stopped watching there haha

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  16. Although BEP sucked, The Who wasn't really all the great either (compared to their former glory anyways) imo.

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  17. Slightly preferrable....slightly

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  18. I knew they would suck and I knew Fergie would sound terrible, but I was blown away at just how much worse she sounded than I was expecting. I thought she sounded bad even in her prime, but now it's like she's trying to sound as horrible as she possibly can. I was thoroughly disgusted.

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  19. i thought the light suits the people on the field had were cool but the music was awful. after the half time show i went right back to call of duty.

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  20. the packers winning made me forget all about that terrible half time show

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  21. i actually turned the volume down and left the room for the 1/2time show. it made it better, but i could still feel the bad energy blowing all the way up here from texas.

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